I am sure most people know that I have been selected for Teach for Malaysia and will be the first batch to be sent to Sarawak. And I am sure people around have been speculating whether I will be sent to Kapit or not ever since my outburst to Facebook. Lol. Well, the TFM lady called me and mentioned that the ROS (Rancangan Orientasi Sekolah, also known as School Orientation Program) will either be held in Kuching or Kapit, and high likely it will be in Kapit. Lol.
Before I continue ranting about my possible placement to Kapit and how can I survive rural life, first of all I would like to answer a few questions that have been pointed out on me.
1) Study so hard as engineer, why in the end become teacher?
Firstly, let's put it this way. I am not a teacher. In fact, I have never considered teacher as my lifetime profession and it will not be. That I am absolutely sure. I see myself more as an education engineer - to change lives of students. How on earth do I change the students' lives, when all I do is to teach? This is when I have to be creative and open-minded to bring the students to improve their studies and at the same time be a better person. Teachers only teach students; I improve the students' lives. The difference between me and a typical engineer is that they deal with machines and softwares while I deal with living things with brains - students.
2) There are so many ways of leaving an impact, but why choose TFM?
Yes, there are. In fact, the TFM interviewer mentioned that I could have continued being an engineer and at the same time getting involved in voluntary works. But if you are truly dedicated to leave an impact on the students' lives, part-time voluntary work is not enough. This requires full time and commitment, of which TFM could give me. Two full years of commitment, time and energy is what I can offer for the students. As a normal human being, I will always prioritize. Hence, if I were to become an engineer, I would be bound to the commitments (family, debts, loan) so much that I will not give up my source of income to do voluntary work. I will work just for the sake of fulfilling my commitments and earning money. Gone is the purpose of living life with meaning. As the saying goes, once you start it, continue doing it until the end. Thus, TFM.
3) Aren't you worried of starting over after 2 years of commitment to TFM? You will be competing with the fresh graduates within your field, and you will be 27 by then!
Of course I have thought of that. I may even be worried that I cannot catch up in my own engineering field and will be discarded. But then again, we live in the present, not the future. The future is so uncertain that it can only be carved by our present doings. Hence, live in the present and do things which make me happy, and for sure will not regret for life. My idealistic nature can be a pain in the ass sometimes for those hardcore realists.
4) What if you got posted into rural areas?
If I were to join TFM only to request to teach nearby my home, then that defeats the purpose of TFM at the very first place. Sure, there are problematic urban schools, but the most prominent schools with very low proficiency are mostly from rural schools, with very little exposure to the world. I know it may be as bad as not having internet, having to travel by boat and even having transport inconvenience to obtain daily needs. Think of it this way. I am getting out of my comfort zone to push myself beyond my limits. I have been living fairly comfortably for so many years now (not exactly comfortable, but more comfortable than a major fraction of Sarawakians). It is time for me to share my comfort with them and at the same time having them to share their life with me. Who knows, they end up teaching me more. Things may go the other way round and I end up as an even better individual than I am now. Besides, I can at least tell my future children that I used to ride a boat to school everyday to teach.
5) Won't your parents object?
At first, they definitely objected my decision when I told them I would be flying back to Kuching to attend the final interview for TFM. Study so hard, RM4k engineer salary don't want, but go become teacher instead with salary of RM2.5k. I understand that they need my help financially at some point of life. I seem selfish to work as a teacher at rural areas instead of becoming an engineer and earn more money to help my family. But at the end of the day, it is my happiness that matters to them, and they will definitely support me at the end of the day. My dad even told me how is Kapit, and my mom accompanied me for baju kurung shopping. Their concern though, is my placement as they prefer me to be placed nearby home instead, while I prefer to go deep inside Sarawak.
I guess that is all for the questions and I have answered every single one of them.
Resume ranting.
I heard from people saying that I have to travel by boat to Kapit from Sibu because it is located across the river. Horror. Imagine moving around the boat daily to and fro. I think it will be very tiring for me. Besides, there is no line at Kapit, so communication will be difficult. Sucks for those experiencing LDR. But if people broke up because one of them is placed at Kapit and they do not communicate everyday, then the relationship is not worth it at all. As for me, I can imagine myself travelling to school by boat, teaching the local students at great difficulty due to communication and their lack of interest in studying, and then frustrated and get tired at the end of the day. I also can imagine myself staying up late just to plan the lessons for the students.
But I know deep down inside that at the end of the day, everything will be paid off. If this is a calling for me, I will answer it by taking part in TFM. Teach the students who need me. Share with them the meaning of education and life. And what matters the most is, it makes me happy. Period.
