Last night, I had a Google Hangout Session with the TFM people and I found that in Sarawak, I will be posted somewhere 2 hours drive away from Kuching. Well, that means no boat ride to school for me, but these places will still be rural areas. I requested for rural areas from TFM because I would like to get out from the comfort zone. However, I felt a tinge of sadness inside my heart. My life for a quarter century has always been like this:
Kuching (where I grew up until pre-university days) -> Miri (university days) -> somewhere ulu in Sarawak at Kuching/Samarahan region (first 2 years of work)
So tentatively, I spent a quarter century in Sarawak throughout my life. So much for adventure huh? I already tasted my first bitter disappointment when I was enrolled in Form 6 despite my competitive SPM results. I ended up spending my pre-university days opposite my high school for two good years. I lost motivation in studies, because I thought that I would end up studying at local university anyway. There goes my adventurous life abroad.
I was relieved that I will be enrolled in a private university instead of a public university, because that would means less restriction and more exposure towards diversity. Bad news is that my university is only an hour flight away, in the same state. I spent my four good years in Miri, Sarawak, of which the culture and lifestyle is very much like Kuching. It was as if I never moved out at all. However, I was glad that I lived on my own and learned to be independent, and proved that I was capable of being independent. University life is where I searched for my own true self, and I am glad I am on my way to searching who I really am and where do I belong.
Hence, I entered TFM for a further self-search, because I would want to be part of the "contributing to the mankind" thing. I wanted to get out of yet another comfort zone, and at first, I wanted to be placed in the West Malaysia. But it was found that the education in Sarawak was one of the worst in Malaysia, and I thought that I might as well work in Sarawak, and work at Kapit division places. The more ulu places I go, the further I can fly. That was what I thought. It turns out that I will still end up in Kuching, and while most people are happy for me, deep down inside I was expecting yet another adventure outside home. I would still end up nearby home at the end of the day, and I will feel restricted.
I have always want to stay for a few years at a place where the culture and the people are different from here, so that I can experience something different before coming back home and appreciate. Living at a foreign country for a few years is different from travelling you see. You only travel to live at tourist spots, not living like a local. Damn I should have applied for student exchange back then >< but who knows right, another adventure is awaiting me. The only way to console myself is that adventures happens everywhere, not necessarily abroad but it can happen within my hometown as well. Lol.
