Today marks my last day of teaching at Chung Hua Middle School No.1, a Chinese medium high school. I somehow managed to survive despite not knowing how to speak standard Mandarin; I sometimes tend to get blur whenever the students spoke too fast.
Anyway, today is also one of the most depressing days ever. I invigilated Senior 1E, an Arts Stream class. I invigilated two papers, which were Sejarah and Bookkeeping respectively. Earlier this morning, I was informed by the teacher-in-charge that there are CCTVs installed in each classroom. Shocking, yes. I later entered each class and noticed that indeed, there are CCTVs behind each classroom. Talking about horror.
I reminded the students of that particular class about the CCTV and asked them to behave and not to cheat. It was a horrible experience, because students there were so playful and they fooled around throughout the examination period. They took the paper, wrote their name and started talking towards one another. Despite my several attempts to shut them up, they ignored me. I had to raise my voice and threatened them to give their names to the principal if they did it again.
And the drama began. The discipline teacher went into my classroom and called out a few students, saying (in Mandarin), "You, you, you and you all. *pointing to a few students* I saw you all cheating." Then she took out their "cheating devices" hidden at weird corners. She then added, "I saw what you did on CCTV. Don't try to deny. You will automatically fail, and I will make sure you get disciplinary action."
I was scared, of course. I had the names of the students who fooled around. The teachers asked me to give the names of the students who fooled around and did not do the papers. I was in a dilemma. Some of the students were good boys. They were not bad; they were just naughty. Sigh.
After class, I went to find the disciplinary teacher regarding this matter. Indeed, these disciplinary people saw everything via CCTV, and they paid special attention to my class because I am a temporary teacher and they think it is difficult for me to control a notorious class. Hence, she said that the students will be expelled.
"No chance shall be given to them?" I asked.
"No. They should know the consequences if they fooled around or cheated during examination. They deserved it. No chances should be given to them," said the teacher-in-charge.
My heart sank. I always believe in seeing someone in good light. Those students I mentioned were good-natured students (the boys). The girls were rude and disrespectful so they kind of deserved it. But the boys, no, they were actually respectful towards teachers and knew what was right or wrong. Just that they wanted to play ALL THE TIME. Just that they were naughty. And because of this incident, they will be expelled. What would their parents think? What would they feel regarding this matter?
I know in life, actions are divided into forgiving and punishing. To give chance means to encourage others to forgive. To punish means to teach them a lesson. I cannot say that one is better than another. But I always try to stay to the former one, to give chance because everyone has a good side and no one must simply give up on them just because they have made mistakes. But again, when people keep doing things despite being warned several times and knowing the consequences, perhaps they need to get a taste of their own medicine.
I will face many of these in the future. I know, my attitude will always cause people to step above my head. But I still have a long journey to go, and I still have so many things to learn. Perhaps time will tell whether each decision is right for each situation and what not. I can only think this way.
p/s: I know my students will read this. I feel a bit weird knowing my students stalking all over me. Should I be happy instead?
